In No Particular Order

A brief dissertation on the problems with linear thought

"I don’t think linear thought, on the whole, has done anything but create a world of sleeping people. Linear progression creates a goal oriented society, mindlessly trying to go from checkpoint to checkpoint in an attempt to create meaning. It doesn’t promote independent thought, instead it creates a bizarre “standard” for what it means to be successful. Success is not happiness it is the achievement of someone else’s goals. Like a strange board game that we’ve all agreed to play. You can’t move towards winning until you’ve accomplished all the tasks. Why?

When or how did we agree to this? Why do I need to go to school? “Because if you don’t go to school you won’t be successful, you won’t get a good job and be a productive member of society, you won’t find a partner who will love you”

Why do I need to find a partner? “Because if you don’t get married you can’t have children “

Why do I need children? “Because if you don’t have children than what was the meaning of your life?”

When can I get out of this game? “When you retire. You get to enjoy your life of purposelessness . That’s when the wife and children, career, self sacrifice and drive for money all pay off. You’ll have money in the bank and grandchildren, you can go to sleep and enjoy the fruits of your labor “

WHY? Why do I want this? Any of this? “Because if you don’t do this you’ll fail, and you’ll be sorry”

What starts the game? Linear progression. The concept of time sets us up to believe that there is an inevitable beginning and end. That there are touch points to be achieved along the way and if you don’t get serious you’ll never go anywhere. My calendar and my clock are the yoke that ties me to this plow. The fact that it will be night at some point, and I will be able to sleep keep me going. But is this really who and what I want to be? Are we just so much cattle. I’d argue that cattle have it better. They don’t feel the need to do much of anything, on some level they know their purpose.

My clock, my calendar then replace my inherent desire for something els, something more, for real meaning, for purpose. I am trapped in a world obsessed with the progression of life along a linear trajectory. It doesn’t serve me, not spiritually at least. It does nothing for the feeling that there must be more. Everyday I see the effects of time and I feel the progression to an end. I’m constantly being reminded and asked how I’m doing in the game. Like crabs in a bucket everyone agrees to not escape and are constantly pulling each other back in.

I want out! I want to live in Now, I want to stop counting birthdays, and watching the clock, I want to be in this moment. I’m attempting to have less and less commitment to my clock. I’m doing this by being where I am while I’m there. Not going into what brought me there or where I’m going next. Just at peace in the only real truth that is, “now”. I don’t believe that at the end of my life I’ll need a huge list of achievements, but I will ask myself was my life purposeful? Did I live the life of an awakened person or did I live for greater comfort? How much of my life did I miss thinking about things that had nothing to do with being present?

I met a girl a few years ago that said “when it’s a nice day I like to take pictures of the flowers so that I can look at them later. “

I was disgusted by this. Why can’t you just enjoy the gift that you’ve received why do you miss what is, for what will never be. That’s the difference between photography and painting. A photograph is an attempt to capture a moment that is not appreciated. Whereas a painting is an attempt to appreciate a moment that can’t be captured.

There is no order to these little essays. There is some limited order to the things presented here. I should like to have a space outside of linear thought, at least as much as possible. In further essays I will present different ideas that I have on particular beliefs. I encourage you to join in the discussion and ask questions and participate. I will elaborate as much as possible but I want this to be a multi dimensional conversation and as such, I’m hoping my art, movie references, music and words will all be viewed as a part of a whole."

- PD